A human getting pissed at their vampire boyfriend so they put in a silver sterling tongue stud and bracelets and earrings and their vampire boyfriend is just standing five feet away like “babe. c’mon.”
Vampire: “The fair is in town, maybe a date will help…”
human spends the whole time in the hall of mirrors
WE HAVE A NEW WINNER.
"I don’t understand bisexuality, I don’t think it exists"
well I don’t understand physics but you don’t see me floating off into space because gravity no longer applies to me
Mitt Romney spent over 800 Million not to become president. I spent no money for the same result. Who’s the better businessman?
"Don’t take ~chemicals~ like prozac, I heard you can get the same effect by eating 19 oranges a day, that’s only 570 oranges a month!!!"
"Yeah I know you have horrible panic attacks but like, have you tried yoga?"
"Yeah I understand depression completely stops you from doing everyday tasks AND that you then feel guilty about that… But you have to just power through it and get on with things as normal!"